It's taken me 33 years to realize I don't like sharing everything. She doesn't probably know it but my friend Laura over at Life Happens and Girl Talk is stirring up a need to be completely open and honest on my blog. She challenges herself on things to improve on and well I want to do the same. I don't like to be completely vulnerable. I'm already so emotional, very caring and think with my heart too many times and not my brain (only at work), I don't want to expose myself even more. But here it goes...
I binge eat. I don't purge after. Thank goodness. I binge eat when I'm bored or emotional. Food is my comfort. It doesn't matter what it is. I hate that and since I'm so emotional, I tend to eat and eat. It's like I have no will power. I feel like I'm never going to loose anymore weight because I binge. I don't do it all the time. It usually happens about once a week. Sometimes I don't even realize it's happening until all of the particular food that I was eating is gone or if I'm lucky almost gone.
What's good now...I know I do this. Most of the time I'm binge eating in between meals and so after I realize what I have done, I don't eat for the rest of the day. I just can't put anymore calories in my body. Then I try to get to the gym. Before I started on my healthier lifestyle...(haha binge eating is not healthy) I still ate meals. I only do this alone. Anytime I've lived with someone, I rarley did this. I'm thinking, I also do this out of loneliness.
The TV sure doesn't help either. I did great when I didn't have cable. I think it's time to get rid of it. It's time to get my life on track and get this binge eating under control.
I find that the TV makes me want to eat also. I turn it on to watch Grey's Anatomy or something and suddenly I'm craving a bowl of ice cream.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I find your honesty refreshing. I think it is perfectly okay to put yourself out there sometimes. You might be surprised at how many other people are in the same situation.
I hope you find that being able to talk about your "faults" and "flaws" is freeing. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd if you only binge eat once a week you are way ahead of me! (I tend to snack on chips every afternoon. And I eat mindlessly as I sit here doing whatever. It's a bad habit and I need to break it. Not sure how to do that yet.)